LORD HAVE MERCY ON ME@!!!!!?

I doubt if anyone is going thru the same thing...but help me PLZ!!! :( Im so dramatic about everything, its so hard to relax, my body is so stiff and tense, my mind is lazy from loud music and marijuana. I try to relax and be cool, i cant!!! IM SOOO ANXIOUS, cant even sit wit my family and watch movies. People are afraid of me, b/c im big n wild, but i dont mean harm, i wanna make friends, and i seem to mess up everytime. when i try to relax my body aches REALLY bad, and its hard for me to breathe....i cant stop thinking or wondering, its like im not even awake, i walk around with my head down, ppl p rite by me like im not here!!! it makes me feel alienated from everyone. i always got nonsense on my mind, i dont feel comfortable...even when i sleep im not relaxed, b/c i have terrible nightmares, wake up early in the morn, hungry and thirsty...its been goin on for years, im ready to end, im not a good talker, and i rush too much....CHRIST someone plz give me a clue...im still livin w/ my parents and my moms is a TOP MAJOR B**** so i cant relax AT ALL. im ashame in public, god im ready to pull the trigger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!